One brave college football team is letting all you armchair quarterbacks out there put your money where your mouth is this season.
The Akron Zips announced this week that they will let one fan call plays during the team’s first offensive series in the Sept. 12 home-opener against Robert Morris.
Yes, you read it right. No, it’s not a typo.
An actual Division I FBS college football team is letting an actual fan call actual plays against an actual opponent.
What a wonderful time to be alive:
“We’re always looking for new ways to bring our fans closer to the program,” Akron AD, Dr. Andrew T. Goodrich, said. “This is about giving one of our most loyal supporters a seat at the table, right alongside our coaching staff, on the biggest night of the season.”
The promotion, aptly titled “Offensive Coordinator of the Game,” is for season ticket holders only. Every current season ticket holder will be automatically entered into a random drawing for the promotion, with every season ticket counting as an entry.
Here’s the real kicker: Season ticket holders will also receive additional entries for every new season ticket holder they successfully refer.
Now, I know what everyone’s thinking …
“Of course it’s only for season ticket holders. Us common folk can’t afford that. The rich get richer!”
Wrong.
A quick scan of Akron’s website shows me that season tickets range from $75 to $181, depending on the seats. That’s it! This ain’t Alabama or Ohio State.
This is Akron. No offense to the Zips, who are a staple of Mid-Week MACtion every season, but you know what I mean.
You can essentially call an actual offensive series for the price of YouTube TV. What a deal!
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I’m all in, by the way. Some folks think this will end horribly. No shot. This is a win-win spot for the Zips, and, more importantly, for America.
All we do is complain all season about horrible play-calls. Now, we — the common men and women — have a chance to prove to these teams that we know what we’re talking about.
I’m talking flea-flickers on the first snap of the game. I’m talking end-arounds and fake punts and triple reverse wide receiver passes on third and one.
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I’m talking NEVER punting the football. Never, ever. I don’t care if it’s 4th and 100.
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We’ve all played a college football video game at one point in our lives, right? I led dozens of programs to a national title back in the day as a lazy middle school coach. I was absolutely LETHAL with the option attack in NCAA 06 when Pat White and the West Virginia Mountaineers were an absolute MACHINE.
ZERO BS. JUST DAKICH. TAKE THE DON’T @ ME PODCAST ON THE ROAD. DOWNLOAD NOW!
And now, we have the chance to put all our years of hard work and dedication to the actual test next month against Robert Morris.
What can go wrong?